Letting Go of Rabbits (and Children)

     One of our neighbors up the street once owned a few pet rabbits, but at some point they either escaped or were let go.  Now, it's not unusual to come home to find a big black and white rabbit sitting on our front lawn, watching the world go by.  They're so comfortable that recently while I was working in the garden planters around our front door, one of them came so close, I could have reached out and touched it.  I didn't, and so she stayed there and watched me work.

     Now I know why.  Last week we discovered that the rabbit had made a nest in one of the planters and had given birth to four of the cutest, fluffiest bunnies you will ever see.  I am convinced that mama rabbit watched me work to make sure I left her children alone.

     Since our discovery, my daughter has put out a bowl of clean water, taking care to refresh it several times a day, and we've practically demolished our herb garden to make sure they had something to eat. Every morning we've watched as their mother comes back to nurse them, taking extra caution not to disturb her, and two of them are more than willing to be petted.  But this morning, I walked out to find that two of them had hopped down from the planter and were scampering among the bushes.  Staying close to the house, they hopped back and forth, nibbling the grass, all while their two siblings watched them from above.  I panicked.  What if the mother is not finished nursing them? What if our giant dog gets them? What if the fox we occasionally see in the woods attacks them?  Should we try to catch them and put them back in the nest?  I very much want our rabbits to make it in this world, and I'm concerned about their safety.

     And then it hit me. I am acting like a mother who is getting ready to send her daughter off to college.  

     It's a scary thing to let your children go.  What if they don't make friends easily? What if they don't get along with their roommates? What if they don't get the classes they want, the professors they want, the sorority they want?  Even worse, what if something terrible happens to them...one of those things we don't like to talk about but should.  What if they drink too much?  What if they are assaulted?  Who is going to be around to protect them from all the bad things in the world? What if, after graduation, they never come back home?

     Not unlike our children, two of our rabbits seem ready to hop away and explore the world, while two of them seem a little more reticent to leave their secure nest. But give them a few more days, and they will also be gone.  If I had my way, they would all stay in the nest, but I know that is not the way the world works. When it was time for my own daughter to leave for college - thousands of miles away - I had my own mantra that I repeated every time I got lonely or worried. 

"This is the way it is supposed to be."

     Our children are supposed to leave us.  They are supposed to spread their own wings, test their mettle, make their own mistakes. With every passing year, they are supposed to find their own path, one that is independent of their parents.  They are supposed to make their own lives, and for a parent, that's the best reward.  There's nothing quite like seeing your children become strong, self-sufficient adults, capable of handling the smallest and most significant details of life.

     I have lost sleep this week worrying about our bunnies. There are no guarantees, of course, and my daughter keeps reminding me about the circle of life.  So we will soon watch them all hop away and maybe, just maybe, we will catch a glimpse of them every so often.  Then again, perhaps they will find another neighborhood, one that suits them better.  All I know is that with rabbits or children, this is the way it is supposed to be.