Random Thoughts on Building a Life

While going through some old notes yesterday, I ran across a comment that really resonated with me, and it's excellent advice for high school students.  "Build a life, and then find the colleges that fit you."  Too often students try to  manufacture a resume that they believe will fit a certain college rather than creating a life built around what they love and looking for colleges that will appreciate them for who they really are. 

Of course asking a sixteen or seventeen year old who they really are can be kind of tricky.  But I believe my students already have some ideas, and I think this article is excellent advice for young women embarking on the college search or a career.

I've written before about the problem with asking a high school senior what they want to be for the rest of their life. When I was eighteen or twenty-five or forty, I had no idea I would end up being a college counselor (and loving it so much!). When I was eighteen I didn't even know there was such a job!  I understand parents want to know their daughters will be able to take care of themselves, but asking a high school senior to declare a career doesn't leave room for the unexpected. It doesn't leave room for that "eureka moment," as the article suggests, and very often the best ideas come from those moments.

I think every high school student could benefit from this advice from Kate White, former editor-in-chief of Cosmopolitan Magazine and one of the contributors to the article.

"...people often suggest that you think about what you love or write down what you are good at. But successful women I interviewed had often found their first or next passion by bumping into someplace. You don't necessarily know what you want until you see it. Go out into the world. Take trains and planes to places you haven't been before. Visit your friends at their workplaces. Go to plays, museums, and galleries. Surf the web. Visit URoulette (a site of random links) and click on tons of different websites. Listen to talks on YouTube. Read your old diaries. Volunteer. Be open to your eureka moment."

I would add that you should read up on lots of other successful women. Follow their blogs if they have one. Ask questions of the women you know personally (okay, men too).  How did they discover their career? What path did they take? What advice would they give? Find several mentors (yes, you can have them in high school). Your mentors will change over time, and that's a sign of progress. Just don't feel like you have to know it all now.  You've got your whole life ahead of you and building a life takes time.